Adrifter II pt 2: Returner

1. past
i will never stop loving you
only till death did we part
But in my heart i carry you
never apart
i couldn't let you go if i tried
and my soul keeps calling back to you
my heart died when I left that ship
if i go back maybe i could bring it back to life

unable to breath
you were the breath in my lungs
unable to bleed
you were the blood in my veins
sweeter than any honey
more beautiful than any star
am i awake
or am i dead
i had my finger in the trigger
did i pull it?
i still remember your face
and how it stopped time
our love
stronger than a nova
greater than a galaxy
please won't you come home to me?


2.fault
head spinning
i caused it
dizzy
though i have not moved
i vomit on the floor
i barely notice it
head in my hands

strike me dead where i stand

3.choice
going back..........
embracing my sorrow here...............
could I make the trek back?

i have no idea

my heart is heavy, it anchors me to her
but my sorrow anchors me here

I know which is heavier


4. returner
i will take a ship back
i will bring her here
maybe then i will be forgiven
or i will die in the attempt
i want for either one
i shall be returner


5.abstraction of movement
i am moving, moving towards something
someone
but space is a behemoth
these stars pass by too slowly
it does not feel like I am moving
i am moving but standing still

i hope she is waiting
i am coming
however abstract my movement...


6.adrifter
adrifting here for days.
space is so big
and am i so small
how could i find a single ship
in this black sea

crying out for her
crying out for You

save me from doubt

i know that "the darkness will not be dark to You"
give me Your eyes


7.healing
there is a garden
and a river runs through it
and there we find redemption
and there we find healing
come dip your soul in the river
broken hearts
be healed
i swim to the bottom
and drink deep of it's water

my love, forgive me

come
let us swim
come

there is garden
and a river runs through it
and it's waters heal my soul


8.found
Your singing wakes me
You were singing songs of her
i knew i would find her
You brought me to her
delivered me safely
how can i ever repay You?

you can't

why are You so good to me?

I love you

9. atonement
running to the ship
which was to be my coffin
and is already hers
but i will bring her back
a proper goodbye
---------------- u
---------------- r
---------------- i
---------------- a
---------------- l

this was worth the distance
i love her so much
thank You for bringing me to her
this is my atonement


10. forgiven
shortly after leaving
i drift into sleep
back into the garden

she is there, You are too
singing songs to me

finally free
finally forgiven

My son, you were forgiven long ago
by Me
and by her.

but now, my heart feels free
this no longer owns me

i fall asleep in her arms under a tree by the river


11. redemption
i realize it fully now
i did not have to do a thing to be redeemed
redeemed by You

but i had to make things right
and You blessed my journey

i love You
i love You

cradle me as i joyously
drift
all
the
way

back


12.home
entering earth's orbit
i wonder what that following days
may bring

my heart is filled

no matter what happens
i know i did right by her
and by You
this will all be put to rest
and now I finally can


rest